Keeping Hope Alive: Radical Courage in Difficult Times/Working the Steps Step 9, Part 3

List the result of each habit or incident and how you felt about each.

Write the specific feeling you may have about each, such as anger, hate, shame, guilt, resentment, feel.

Surrender the incident and the feelings you may harbor about yourself or any other person to God.  Ask God to fill the void with love.

Imagine what you might do to make amends to yourself.

Consider these actions:   

Write a letter of forgiveness to yourself or to the person whom you allowed to use or abuse you.    (If you do not feel ready to forgive, can you say that you are willing to be willing to forgive?)

In some way that is meaningful to you, mark this moment as a turning-point.  If necessary, repeat this step until it feels that you are ready to let the behavior and the residual feeling go.   Be as patient with yourself as God is with you.

Make a new list of behaviors that indicate a new beginning.  Ask God to give you the persistence and stamina you need to carry out your new decision.

Consider and begin one new behavior that reflects your decision to be free of the behaviors of self-injury or allowing others to injury, insult or use you.

Mark the moment with an object that symbolizes your new way of being in the world.

Repeat the process until the new way of being in the world becomes a habit.


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